EGO

Up unitl now i thought i knew what i was searching in life

I thought it was happiness,absolute true happiness

I believed with all my heart that i was searching for happiness
i did not know any means to achive this.

At times i was really happy but i couldn't find the reason why i was happy
i could not find a way to make it last forever
So i was sad the rest of the time was unhappy

My actions were not directed toward goal to be happy,
On days which i called a good day a productive day, it was not the feeling of hapiness that consumed me
It something else .may be something that was much more important to me than happiness

When i uttered these words everything fell into place
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fullfillement of my "EGO".
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Yes this was it.
I do the things i do,I believe in the ideas i believe in,I am what i am
Every thing i do,say or think is directed toward this fullfillment of my EGO
It didnt matter if i was truly happy,it only matters that my EGO be satisfied

It is actually a great big never ending cycle.
All things that i do,say or believe make up my EGO.
and Every thing i do,say or think is directed toward this fullfillment of my EGO
ie all thing things that satisfy my EGO derive their very sources from this EGO.
Whenever i used to say true to myself i never knew which is my true self
I know i am true to something ,i could never put a finger on what it is ...
It is my EGO,my great big gigantic EGO

i know my EGO will never be fullfilled,i know i will never be complete
I may never be happy or content or satisfied
But there is no better or more truthful way for me

I can never rest till my EGO is satisfied
I can never be at peace till the "IDEA of ME Comes True".
This is the fools hope that live's on in me ...